my body is super tired, but my mind is awakke to the fullest, clutered with many thoughts to what is the plans for tommorow, new information someone gave me, confusion, and even what to wear tmmrw.
I'm a little fustraded. my problem is quite complicated. maybe its because im sick and tired of complaints and just want someone you care about a lot to just cheer up a bit. I have to admit, jealousy does play a role into this but in the long run that dosent matter anyone. I swear he can do so much better. he just needs to wake up. I just want to make him feel better, slap some sense into him. he got so much options to help him out but is not taking any advantage at all. how can you ask for advice when half the time you keep repeating the god damn same answer; "I can't. I don't know. I don't want to..." don't tell me that, I BEEN THERE TO HELL AND BACK. and lemme tell you something. be grateful she's still there, and at least she hasnt moved on and hooked up with your bestfriend... just please, realize you are so better off without her..
after a while finding anwers for other people, leads me back to my problems. I lay there thinking of past times, and how I remember I loved someone. I miss it. I have to admit I wish I can see the one I fell for... that I can see him again and again; but he's long gone.
I don't want a valentine this year, or at least I know I want to spend it with someone I know I have feelings for without feeling rushed or uncomfortable.. even with or without a v-tine, im down to club or relax.
im such a playerrr; my quote on quote radar is quite big. my list seems to be biggerrrr little by little. haha me likely though. well see who can lasttt.
goodnight.
happybirthdaymatthewwww !
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