ugh, confusion.

i got work in like 3 hours, so in a bit i'mma take a shower, and take my time. i kind of wanna sit outside for a little and maybe get my last roll of film and start clicking away.

to be honest, i been a bit fustraded. i don't even know if it is this thing, or something else. because its like, it dosen't bother me to the extent.. but its enough to be like what should i do now?

i really made up my mind. i'm ready to have someone in my life again. i'm ready to open up, put my guard down, and maybe see what else that can be out there. i mean being single isn't really all that bad, i pretty much am use to it now. i like the whole, no boundries bull shit.. but then again, i want a fuckin' challenge.

i'm getting so bored, i'm getting so restless. its like the more i try to move on, or see if theres potential.. then that plan fails or either.. i'm not feelin' it at all. thats the sad part too. i just want to be hella juiced again. i wanna be able to talk and tell stories about what happened between him/her and me that day. its kind of like, i miss highschool butterflies down to even last bit of being with someone, or at least have DIBS.

people are just so confusing and stupid. i dont get them. its like one day, you can decide whenever you want to this or that. its like god dammit make a move already! but, i offically dont even like anyone..

or maybe i do. and i just cant move on... ugh. its like that movie "rules of attraction".

"no one will never know no one.
and you'll never ever get to know me. "

its like no one ever appericates the fact people like them or something. and that person never likes that certain someone. truth is; its never ever gonna be the way you want it to be. even how badly your craving for them. so bad, it hurts and you just want one more chance, only if your willing to give one.


x_____________ ( your name here. )
help me.